ITS CAN BE HARD TO EXIST IN DEEP SUMMER HEAT
I’ve never particularly been the type of person who “thrives” in summer. Sure I enjoyed summer break as much as the next kid that would rather spend her days reading in her room as much as the next school avoidant kid but perhaps it’s the Arizonan in me. I just don’t “do summer” well. It was a little easier before I was a parent but the reality of parenthood is there is so much pressure and stress when your main job is raising a tiny person. After all, all this “work” will be their childhood.
Things definitely got more challenging when my son hit the age where all of a sudden he also realized how hot it is outside and was not particularly thrilled. This isn’t a conversation about how temperatures are on the rise at an alarming and unsustainable rate but that anxiety always sits in the back of my head. There is so much anxiety involved in parenting and for a gal who was first diagnosed with an anxiety disorder at 18 I have to say I’m very proud of how far I have come.
Sometimes Even the Most Passionate Birders Need boundaries
But I feel like I came this far by learning when I need to set boundaries. I love Mama Birder like a second child. I have found so much joy in building this little corner of bird heaven but sometimes I can take over my brain. Just ask my friends. I can often get a little too obsessed with trends, metrics, followers, growth blah blah blah. Don’t all creators? We all want to do and be more right? Sometimes I look at other creators with jealousy. They often seem to have the charm, free time, and drive that I can’t often achieve.
But you know what? We are all running our own race. No one could have warned me when I started all this how much toddlerhood would kick my butt. I have a wildly vivacious and unreasonably stubborn little boy and he deserves all of my love, time, and attention as he is growing and navigating this world. As much as I complain about not having free time to chase every rarity or missing out on an amazing bird by a day because I didn’t have childcare I am reminded how lucky I am for every minute with him and getting to share birds and nature with him when it’s appropriate.
The summer is my husband’s busiest travel time at work, he can’t help it, and the spaces where I would usually have to breathe, relax, and make my silly bird videos is currently taken up by naps and survival mode. However, often when I choose rest I am overwhelmed with guilt. Especially when I have contracted to deliverables, outstanding book reviews, and feel like I’m gaining momentum here. But you know what? That is life. And reality is life is what we do when we are not on the internet (even if the internet is our job or job adjacent) and I sometimes need to pause and remember my family comes first, my contractual obligations second, and everything else third. I hope if you are in a similar boat you also remember that we deserve our rest because you cannot pour from an empty cup.
I have some truly exciting trips coming up like the Tucson Bird Festival and a trip to the Dominican Republic. I can’t wait to truly rest, recharge, and of course do some major birding. With August on its way soon summer will turn to fall and my son and I can return to our wildly outdoor lives we love so much. But until then I will chose my mental health, my rest, and be grateful for each and every person who continues to enjoy and engage with my content.
Thank you, and as always happy birding.
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